Lived and learned...

180, is the number of days I spent living in the Philippines...  I have learned that 180 days is long enough to fall out of love with a country. Long enough to witnessed the toxic effects of greed in the lives of otherwise good people. I've watched people's hearts grow dark as they tear each other down for their own benefit. I have watch hatred poison people's character and clarity of judgement. I have watched how quickly people will use the children they are supposed to be caring for to do their dirty deeds. How easily they deceive to be able to line their own pockets further...And the saddest part is that the whole time they use their religion and related titles as a mask to proclaim a guise of innocence. In 180 days you can be forced to learn to live in doubt, to question every interaction and every relationship...to have to distrust more easily than you trust. To have to put measures in to protect you from the many faced liars that are hosting you.  Its also all the time it takes for you to learn that it's possible to keep fighting a battle with a broken heart, to have to fight through the betrayal and deceit..to find the strength to stand up for those that need you to be their voice of reason against a barrage of lies. 180 days is all it takes to be able to differentiate the battles worth fighting from the hollow noise.  You will soon come to realise that 90 days is all it takes to once again observe the power and resilience in people that truly want change. For people that are cut down to rise up again and move on. To be shown that there are still reasons to love the people of a nation you recently fell out of love with. To be reminded not to judge a whole nation or a religion by the actions of a few individuals. To be reminded that the children that seem stuck and are emitting hatred are only serving as gramophones to relay someone else's hatred...and with time they would realise their true potentials and begin to see the possibilities that life now holds for them. As cheesy as it sounds 90 days is truly all it takes to restore your faith in humanity. To be reminded that LOVE heals the scars inflicted by anger and bitterness. To learn of the sheer strength behind your true friendships. To truly appreciate the people that have stuck up for you and have despite the distance between you still walked by you throughout the whole 180 day.  The last 180 days were some of the hardest I have lived through so far...certainly not what I expected out of life for my 28th year. In no way have I begun to process the experience in full...but I know for certain that I'm grateful for all it has taught me and how it continues to grow the person I am. And if yo are one of the people who's walked with me through this (you know who you are), THANK YOU for everything you have done and have contend to do for me...